WTMFI Wednesdays – Should it return?

The Rantings - For Adults 18+

Way back in 2010, I was publishing two blogs: The Rantings of a Tortured Mind – PG Edition and The Rantings of a Tortured Mind – XXX Edition. On the latter, I wrote about the beginnings of mine and The Boyfriend’s relationship, my kinky sexual desires and I began the weekly meme all about sex, WTMFI (Way Too Much F***ing Information) Wednesdays.

WTMFI Wednesdays
WTMFI Wednesdays

For 26 weeks, every Wednesday, five questions (plus a bonus) would be posted to my blog. I would add my own answers and invite readers to participate. It was the first time in my life that I experienced knowing that people were reading my blog and I even had a regular participant create a Twitter hashtag for me – which at the time was brand new to me, I had never used hashtags before.

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 1: The First Time

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 2: Masturbation

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 3: Pornography

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 4: Have You Ever… #1

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 5: Would You Rather… #1

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 6: Adult Toys

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 7: Erotic Inspiration #1

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 8: Have You Ever… #2

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 9: Sexuality 101

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 10: Would You Rather… #2

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 11: Orgasms

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 12: Body Modification

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 13: Erotic Inspiration #2

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 14: Have You Ever… #3

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 15: Sexting

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 16: Monogamy Isn’t a Type of Wood

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 17: For Women Only

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 18: For Men Only

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 19: Couple’s Retreat

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 20: Would You Rather… #3

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 21: Have You Ever… #5

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 22: Anal Explorations

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 23: Sex & Music

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 24: Exhibitionist’s Delight

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 25: Would You Rather… #4

WTMFI Wednesdays – Week 26: BDSM 101

I miss doing these! So much! Not only was it fun to try and think up all the questions, it was awesome to get to answer a lot of them and I loved that it forced me to regularly blog. I’m totally considering restarting and bringing back WTMFI Wednesdays. What do you think?!?

Would you like to see WTMFI Wednesdays return? Would you participate? 

 

5 Things That Happened During My Hiatus

The Rantings - For Everyone

My hiatus officially began in the fall of 2016 and by Christmas, I had shut down my blog and turned its maintenance feature on. I went silent on social networks for awhile and allowed The Erotic Writers Group (which at the time had about 750 members and of which I am the sole moderator) to run itself. I explained the reasons why in the post Welcome Back… Finally!!!, so today I wanted to tell you about 5 relatively major life events that happened during my hiatus.

  1. Cazzwell’s Birth

    We had hoped it wouldn’t happen in September and he heard us and came on the last day of August. I woke up from contractions in the late afternoon. Kaeidyn insisted we wake The Boyfriend up and he insisted we go straight to the hospital the moment he saw my face.

    In what was called a “precipitous labor” (which Google has informed me means a labor that takes less than 3 hours from start to finish), we welcomed Cazzwell into the world. The first few weeks were an adjustment to say the least. He took awhile getting back up to his birth weight, so there were more doctors visits and home visits than we had been anticipating, which made things more stressful. The kids all wanted to be such big help but hadn’t had much experience with newborns, so lots of heart stopping moments. And, there was a new baby in our house for the first time seven years… So, there was that…

    In the last almost 6 months, he’s grown exceptionally fast. Sprouted his first tooth at 4 months, he sits up all by himself and now he’s figuring out crawling – already up on the hands and knees, kinda rocks himself and then falls forward onto his belly. You’d be amazed at how far across a room he can make it like that! Everywhere we go, all anyone can talk about is how quickly he’s growing up.

  2. I Turned 30

    The best thing about turning 30 was definitely The Boyfriend! After the kids broke my last laptop, he went out and got me a new one. Then, spent the day making me feel like his sexy older woman, because that’s a thing now until he turns 30 (very soon – muwhahaha!). The kids were all sweet before school, waking me up with Happy Birthdays but after school, they were their normal usual bratty selves.

    I had made a lot of plans for things that I wanted to have done in my life by the time I was 30. I wanted to be married – even telling The Boyfriend that if he hadn’t married me by the time I was 30, it wasn’t going to happen. I wanted to have a career and be on my way to owning a home and have my driver’s licence and know where my g-spot is…

    Alas, that was not what coming into 30 has been like, at all. I’m still only common-law and at this point probably always will be. I’m jobless in a rented townhouse being driven around by my much-more-amazing-than-I-deserve boyfriend and I still orgasm from clitoral stimulation only! I honestly thought I would be a lot more upset about it. And I was, on the 13th day of November, devastated. But then, when I woke up the next day, I was washed in gratitude and so far, that is what 30 has been for me. Everyday, I look at what life has given and is giving me and I am just so grateful!

  3. Got a Guitar

    I posted on Facebook that I missed having a guitar. I do it every time I’m without a guitar for any length of time. One of my maternal aunts, who I sadly never talk to anymore, commented asking when I’d be home. A day or two later, she brought over a guitar.

    It’s nothing crazy special and she’s not super amazing, but holding a guitar in my hands again feels really good! I’ve been doing terribly at playing her and am saddened when I think about how much time she spends put away. But it’s been a long time since I’ve played and so often times, it feels like I’m having to relearn everything I already know or like I just absolutely suck. And sometimes, I can have fun in that place where I’m sucking and just go with it and smile, but other times, it just makes me not want to play for a while.

    Plus, none of the people in my house seem to have any respect for a guitar session!! I can play through a lot of things, but lately, it has been exceptionally hard to play through my family.

    From The Boyfriend, who not only doesn’t listen to me play at all (which always bothers me a little bit) but also has to leave the volume up just enough on his games to be completely distracting, to the older children who decide that the moment I start playing is the moment to ask me questions and tell me every detail about whatever game it is they are playing (or in the case of Kaeidyn, which anime she’s watching…) to the baby who apparently isn’t very fond of guitar (or maybe it’s the guitar over top of all the other noises) because I have only had one session so far that wasn’t interrupted by a total tantrum.

  4. Almost Baby #6

    Sometime near the middle of January, we discovered that we were pregnant again. Definitely not what we had wanted or were expecting. I was literally shaking and sweating as I took the second test, because we didn’t trust the first one. We waited a week until we told his sister and mom and then we told the kids. Kaeidyn literally broke down in tears and told us we “can’t have anymore kids!” and only Carter seemed excited. We didn’t tell my mom until…

    Two weeks later, I had a day of some pretty intense cramps and some bleeding and about a week after that, I – as the doctors put it – “expelled the tissue”. I cried hard, really hard. Harder than I had expected to. Not because I was upset that I had lost the baby. That I was mostly relieved by because I don’t feel ready to have a Baby #6. I was upset because I had miscarried. Because I had had to feel it and experience it. Because I couldn’t maintain a life. Because, yet again, I had failed.

    Ultimately, I haven’t been all that affected by it. I spent a few days in a constantly-near-tears state and The Boyfriend was there every time to hold me tight and I came to terms with it relatively easily. Again, not expecting that. I was just saying to The Boyfriend today that I’m glad we weren’t trying, because we aren’t entirely devastated over it. I think if we were trying or even if it was like the other kids where we weren’t necessarily trying but we weren’t doing anything to prevent it, then I think we would have both been ruined by it – I know I would.

  5. #ReDesign2017

    I fell out of love with my blog. It happens more often than I’d like to admit. In the olden days, I would’ve just started a new blog. But I have a domain now, I pay for stuff, I have commitments. So, I undertook the epic challenge of redesigning ValerieRayne.com.

    Honestly, it took a heck of a lot longer than I wanted it to and it was a heck of a lot harder than I was anticipating! Right now though, I’m feeling like it was totally worth it. It inspired me to pick up projects that I had been neglecting, inspired me to start doing #ThrowbackThursdays on Facebook, and I have pages and pages of thoughts and ideas to continue inspiring me. I have fallen back in love with my blog.

    I’ve got lots of plans over the next little while. You’ll see the return of #FridayFavorites and #TumblrFavorites – both even better than they were before. New erotica will be coming your way, especially as The Erotic Writers Group heats up for 2017. I officially started working on The Brighton Tales again and maybe another book *wink*. Some of my biggest goals here this year center around The Sims, The List and The Gallery – all of which I’d like to see a lot more posts in! And as always, I invite you to leave me comments and let me know what you’d like to see more of and I’ll do my best!

The beginning of my life as a 30-year-old mom of five in 2017 (there’s 3 changes in a sentence!) has been filled with ups and downs and weird squiggly lines. It’s been filled with changes and tears and so much gratitude and love. And I’m just so excited glad to be back from my  hiatus. I’m looking forward to 2017 on ValerieRayne.com! Are you?

Welcome Back… Finally!!!

The Rantings - For Everyone

It has been half a year since I last blogged!

In my last post here, The Boyfriend and I weren’t having sex because I was at the very end of what felt like the longest pregnancy of my life. My posting had been sporadic for awhile and the process of carrying and birthing a child and adjusting to life with a new family member just took over entirely.

In August of 2016, we welcomed our fifth child into the world! Previously known as Baby #5, our fourth son, Cazzwell was born. Labor was short and painful and we were home within a day or so. He came exactly when we hoped he would even though we couldn’t have been less prepared – rushing around last minute to get a car seat and diapers and baby clothes.  We rushed so much that we entirely forgot to give him a middle name. He’s the only one of our kids without an amazing one!

The months that have followed his birth have truly been an awesome whirlwind. A bunch of the kids and I all had our birthdays one right after the other, I officially turned thirty, possibly the most boring and also sorta the greatest Christmas and New Year went by, my baby keeps growing up way too fast and finally, I shut down my website.

I fell out of love with everything about my blog. I hated the color, I hated the way things looked, I hated the disorganization that just naturally tends to occur whenever I blog for longer than a couple months. I expected that I would fall out of love with it all and I should’ve prepared for it, but of course, I didn’t. It resulted in a much longer hiatus than I had wanted!

However, those of you who may have seen my website prior to what I’ve dubbed #ReDesign2017, may have noticed that a lot of things have changed around here. There’s new categories (which you can learn more about here or by clicking on any of the categories in the menu at the top or bottom of the page), completely new types of posts and a lot of old ones updated to be better. The Archives have also undergone a major change to be a little bit more simple and again, better. And of course, the entire look and feel of the site has been overhauled.

I have a lot of big plans for the coming days and weeks ahead of us. Most importantly will be to add all new posts to all the new categories and continue the minor site improvements I’m making on the backend. I’ve never looked forward to returning to blogging as much as I did this time around and I’m absolutely excited for the future of ValerieRayne.com.

Be sure to follow me on Twitter, Facebook and Google+ to get updates on new posts when I post them. And, if you like what you see and you’re excited for my return to blogging, let me know by liking this post and drop me a comment below! What are some posts that you’d like to see more of this year on ValerieRayne.com?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of December 4 – 11

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.


Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my #TumblrFavorites posts.

http://valerieraynetumbles.tumblr.com/post/134849076586/artisafeeling-the-center-of-the-universe-jana

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Favorite Google+ Update

I have been attempting to work on a lot of projects that I was hoping to have done by the New Year – mostly The Erotic Writers Group. But I keep coming up against a brick wall…

Circle Me on Google+


Favorite Tweet

In one night, I watched the entire first season of Big Ballet on Netflix and was immediately drawn to Mistress Monica. For the next two days, all I could think about was how adorable her and JackSepticEye would be together.

Follow Me on Twitter


Favorite YouTube Video

Memorable moment: We’re scrolling through our subscriptions on YouTube and Kaeidyn, my 11-year-old daughter says to me, “Please don’t think I’m weird, but can we watch that video“, as I go over SexplanationsSex Toys 101“. I didn’t think she was weird and I still don’t and that’s why we watched the video!

Subscribe to My Channel


Favorite Posts Over the Last Week

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

  • The Cane
    If you enjoy erotic limericks, then you’ll definitely get a kick out of The Cane. 
  • When the Show Makes You Cry
    Have you ever cried uncontrollably at a show? Which ones got to you? 
  • TO DO: Online
    A partial list of all the things that I need to be doing online, or want to be doing…

Follow My Blog


Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of November 27 – December 4

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.


Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my #TumblrFavorites posts.

http://valerieraynetumbles.tumblr.com/post/134109520216/allofmydirtylittlethoughts-jennebenn17

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Favorite Google+ Update

Kaeidyn went to her first ever school dance this week. She looked so beautiful and adorable standing next to her boyfriend at the Winter Formal.

Circle Me on Google+


Favorite Tweet

I’ve been spending some time in a chatroom, as I do every few months, and I’ve attracted a few readers. Love when I reach new view milestones!

Follow Me on Twitter


Favorite Instagram Post

We went to the 22nd (if I remember, correctly) Annual Breakfast with Santa with the kids and it was a total blast (see the post below)! This is turning out to be a much better Christmas than I had anticipated it would be.

Follow Me on Instagram


Favorite Posts Over the Last Week

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog


 Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of November 20 – 27

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.


Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my #TumblrFavorites posts.

View Original Post on Tumblr
View Original Post on Tumblr

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Favorite Google+ Update

We spent almost two weeks without internet and it was definitely not cool! And even though it’s been a week since we’ve been back online, I still kinda feel like this…

Circle Me on Google+


Favorite Song

A little bit of a throwback. There aren’t many country artists I listen to and almost all of them, I can thank Alfie for knowledge of them. But this song makes me happy whenever I’m sad.

Follow Me on Spotify


 Favorite Tweet

I think that Miley’s face in the second picture speaks a thousand words.

https://twitter.com/dropoutofschool/status/630836272903421953

Follow Me on Twitter


 

Favorite YouTube Video

I know that I’ve shared this video somewhere prominent before, but it’s so good, that I’ll continue to share it over and over, because I really do love it so very much!

Subscribe to My Channel


Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog


Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of October 2 – 9

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.

#TumblrFavorites - October
See My Top 5 #TumblrFavorites for October

Follow My Tumblr

Favorite Song

The guitar riff in this song is to die for. And for such a simple song, it evokes such great emotion. I can never get enough of “Never Going Back Again” by Fleetwood Mac.

Follow Me on Spotify

Favorite Google+ Update

There are many places that I’ve always dreamed of traveling to and New York has long been on that list. This post gave me at least two more reasons to go to New York (as if I didn’t already have enough reasons).

Circle Me on Google+

Favorite Tweet

I’m still working my butt off to publish this post. I seem to be struggling something fierce, and it doesn’t make any sense…

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Favorite Pinterest Board

While I love pictures of the sun (which I shared last week), paths seem to be my biggest photographic obsession. I take lots of pictures of paths and this board brings me so much happiness!

Follow Valerie’s board Pathways on Pinterest.

Follow Me on Pinterest

Favorite Facebook Update

I was scrolling through my Facebook feed and was so surprised to see my Mom had shared a Davey Wavey video. Watched the video, loved it, had to share it!

 

Like Me on Facebook

Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

  • Wasting Away
    Do you ever feel like you’re wasting your life away?
  • #BathTime Rantings
    A spotlight on a Google+ post that really should’ve been a blog post…

Follow My Blog

Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of September 25 – October 2

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.

View on Tumblr

Follow My Tumblr

Favorite Google+ Update

I was getting all my online blogging work done left, right and center and then suddenly, the inspiration just left me. I’m still searching 😉

Circle Me on Google+

Favorite Tweet

They recently added Scandal on Netflix and I’ve been doing a lot of watching. I’ll throw it on in the background a lot while I’m doing other stuff. I wouldn’t say that I like this show, but I also wouldn’t stop watching it.

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Favorite Pinterest Board

After taking a few really awesome sun pictures myself, I started looking for more and I have found so many truly beautiful ones. Even a couple of my own on this board 😉
Follow Valerie’s board Sunrise, Sunset on Pinterest.

Follow Me on Pinterest

Favorite Facebook Update

We’re doing fall cleaning during this week, including the first big leaf raking of the yard. It’s always fun to do this with the kids and watch them explore the seasons change.

Like Me on Facebook

Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog

Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

The Lowered Drive is Killing My Writing

This post is intended for adults 18+

One of the biggest problems I seem to be facing with this whole lowering of my sex drive is that I can’t seem to write a single good sentence on any of my erotica. I’ve been desperately craving writing something, I’ve got a story waiting to be finished, I’ve got all these story ideas and plans in my head – and yet, my lowered sex drive is making it impossible!

First of all, the issue of getting aroused. I tend to write my erotica and if it doesn’t turn me on, I scrap it. Because I’m a pretty easy target for arousal, so if it’s not turning me on, it’s probably not very good. However, right now, I’m all out of whack. Stuff that normally turns me on isn’t working at all and so everything I write erotically immediately seems to suck.

Second, the visualization. A huge part of my erotic writing happens because I have a vivid imagination that runs wild with sexual thoughts. Without those visualizations, without the ability to even attempt to have those visions, I have nothing to spring forth from. I have no scene, I have no characters, I have no plot and there’s definitely not any sex!

The lowered sex drive doesn’t seem to be having any effect on any other area of my life except my erotic writing and I am officially noticing and I am officially not happy about it at all! Tonight, as I attempted for the umpteenth time this week to write an erotic piece, I officially hit my breaking point. I kept trying to explore why I was having such a hard time with it, why I’d get two paragraphs in and suddenly be completely lost, why I couldn’t get a single sexual moment out between anything, and I’ve finally figured it out. And I am not happy, not happy at all!

I want to write but I am being way too critical to get it done…

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of September 18 – 25

#FridayFavorites

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.

View on Tumblr

Follow My Tumblr

Favorite Google+ Update

I have been incredibly hard at work this week on The Erotic Writers Group. It has literally taken over all my social networks, I am just consumed in the project. I’ve set a goal date too, so it’s a pretty big deal.

Circle Me on Google+

Favorite Tweet

I told you it was taking over everything!

Follow Me on Twitter

Favorite Instagram Photo

My terrible terrible workspace. Maybe this is why I have such a hard time getting stuff done!

#WorkingHardOrHardlyWorking #WhoCanTell #TheGameIsOn #FinishIfItKillsMe

A post shared by Valerie Rayne (@valerierayne) on

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Favorite Facebook Update

It was Kaeidyn’s 11th birthday last weekend and even though she was at her Dad’s for the weekend enjoying the Fall Festival, I celebrated with pictures!

Like Me on Facebook

Favorite Song

It very rarely ever happens that The Boyfriend becomes obsessed with a song. So rarely, that every time that it happens, I suddenly become obsessed with the song. He loves the lispy “s” in this song so much!

Follow Me on Spotify

Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog

Favorite YouTube Video

It’s an oldie. Like a 2008 oldie. But seriously, this was my absolute favorite video of the time and when I ran across it the other day, I was delighted and overcome with nostalgia. Share it with me 😉

Subscribe to My Channel

Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of September 4 – 11

#FridayFavorites - For Everyone

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

“I’ve been dealing with a lot of stress this week, WAY too many firsts. It resulted in me being completely unaware that it was Friday yesterday and therefore I missed this week’s #FridayFavorites . Oh well, next week…”
View Original Post


Favorite Google+ Update

With back-to-school well underway, there’s lots of lists being made and lots to do. Including goals for the rest of the year…

Circle Me on Google+


Favorite Pinterest Board

I recently ran across a bunch of vintage stuff on Pinterest and this spurred the creation of the All Things Vintage board, which literally has everything vintage!

Follow Valerie’s board All Things Vintage on Pinterest.


Favorite Song

I literally just heard this song thanks to Spotify and it’s suggestions and I think it’s going to end up on my regularly listened to lists very soon! Enjoy “The Wire” by HAIM.


Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.

#TumblrFavorites: Top 5 Tumblrs – September 2015 (View on Tumblr)

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Favorite Facebook Update

It seemed like we spent the entire weekend celebrating Keirnan’s eighth birthday and there was a lot of talking about how long ago it seemed like he was a baby, how much he’s grown.

Like Me on Facebook


Favorite Tweet

I spent part of the week working on stuff for The Erotic Writers Group, which meant that I jumped onto Zazzle for a little bit. While I didn’t get anything done that I had intended to, I did do this…

Follow Me on Twitter


Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog


Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

9 Things You May Not Know About Me

The Rantings - For Everyone

Some of you may have been reading my blogs for years and some of you may have only just found me. Some of you may know me from real life and some of you may have chatted with me online. Almost all of you will know that there’s not that much that you don’t already know about me, but just in case, here’s 9 Things You May Not Know About Me!

  1. I’m a Smoker

    Hello, my name is Valerie Rayne, and I am a smoker… I am not proud of the fact that I smoke and have quit in the past only to pick up the bad habit once more. I have every intention of quitting, someday soon-ish, although my almost two pack a day consumption is hardly convincing anyone. I had my first cigarette when I was 11-years-old and was later caught by my school principal. I vowed never to smoke again and then there was Alfie. That was almost 13 years ago… I’m a smoker.

  2. My Body is Full of Scars

    First, I’ve had 4 babies. Don’t even get me started on the stretch marks, some that are hard to believe are now over 10 years old! My first, Kaeidyn, was an emergency c-section which was absolutely butchered by the surgeon – left me with a crooked line with a dent in the middle, separating my stomach from my pubic mound! Then, in my early twenties, during a serious battle with depression, self-mutilation ran rampant over the flesh of my thighs and arms. My body is full of scars.

  3. I’ve Failed… A Lot…

    It all began my first year of high school and physical education was mandatory and I was just not feeling the whole physical thing. It didn’t take long before my high grades quickly followed that first “F” into the abyss of failure. After a huge setback in Grade 12, I dropped out 2 weeks into my graduating year. I enrolled in a community college of sorts, dropped out a few months later because there was no babysitter backup plan. I’ve been evicted, homeless, on welfare, fired from jobs, broke, broken and I’ve failed… a lot…!

  4. I’m a Serial Monogamist

    I have basically been in long-term relationships since I turned 14. My first love and I dated for 2 1/2 years and experienced all of the “firsts” together. Approximately 8 months went by before I met Alfie. We were together for almost 6 years (give or take, being that we broke up for a few weeks here or there and for a pregnancy) – albeit, we weren’t exactly monogamous. Alfie and I had only been broken up for a few weeks when The Boyfriend and I got together, and we just surpassed our 7 year anniversary. I’m a serial monogamist.

  5. I Suffer from Depression

    After I became pregnant with Kaeidyn, I began experiencing extreme bouts of depression. This has twice landed me in mental institutions, once for an overdose and once for self-mutilation. I have been diagnosed with clinical depression, borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder. Although I dip into “funks” almost every other month, I have been virtually symptom free for over five years without medication. I suffer from depression.

  6. I’m on YouTube

    Not many people know this about me and I think it’s the one thing people find most shocking about me. I’ve recorded a few covers and put them up there (although none of them are as good as the ones I used to have on there, but now have no access to…) and I’m also in the recordings of the hangouts that The Erotic Writers Group did back in 2013. One day, I plan on going back to making videos and I often mean to and then forget entirely, however I’m on YouTube…

  7. I’m Scared of Everything…

    Little birds, ducks, loud noises, thunderstorms, just to name a few. Spiders and dirt and tall grass and deep water. Seaweed and algae, racing heartbeats and stomach aches. Basements and attics, outdoors at night. New foods, new people, new technology, new anything. I have mini panic attacks over simple fears and I find new things to be afraid of everyday. Sometimes, I can work through my fear and deal with it, sometimes I break down and sob like the world is ending. I’m scared of everything!

  8. I Have No Friends

    I have family. I have boyfriends and ex-boyfriends and their families. These people I consider to be my best friends, the ones who will be there for me and love me through everything. I have Facebook friends, mostly people I know through my brother or sister, definitely not people I regularly associate with. I have online friends, where I only know them online and have only ever talked online. Acquaintances more than friends. I find friendship to be a very difficult thing – from the making to the keeping – and I’m not sure I’m complaining. Therefore, I have no friends.

  9. I’m a Picky Eater

    I’ve always been a picky eater. It’s something I desperately want to get over but I just can’t seem to do it. I like potatoes, eggs and rice, beef, pork and chicken, breads, gravy and corn. That’s pretty much it. I’ll eat a few other fruits or vegetables throughout the seasons and get a serious craving for broccoli at least once a year, but other than that, I like to keep it really basic. I don’t like spicy foods or sweet foods, I’m not a huge fan of savory foods and only rarely have a desire for salty foods. I’m a picky eater.

So, there’s 9 things you may not have known about me. Did you find any of them surprising or did you already know them all? Maybe I’ll come up with more things, but at this time, I can’t think of anything you wouldn’t already know. Hope you enjoyed 😉

Check In and Vent

The Rantings - For Everyone

One of the things that I absolutely love about The Boyfriend is his ability to completely calm me when my nerves are running rampant. He can tell immediately when something is up and somehow always manages to say exactly the right things to make me forget how stressed out I feel.

Getting Back-To-School Ready

We went to the school and got all the school lists for the year. I refrained from feeling utterly embarrassed when Kaeidyn inquired what type of counselling programs her middle school will have – and whether or not there will be one for kids whose parents have split up. First of all, we originally asked for counselling due to a break-IN not a break-UP. Second, we don’t think she needs counselling for something that happened seven years ago and has always been an amicable break up. Third, the first time anyone at the school meets us as a family and our kid is already asking for counselling… I’m sure I turned various shades of red!

We plan on waking up early tomorrow to do the actual school shopping. The plan is to go first thing in the morning when the stores are likely to have less people in them so that it won’t be such a hassle keeping track of the four kids. I’m stressing about the financial aspects and how much it’s going to cost, but The Boyfriend says he’s got it all figured out and I know from experience that if he says it, he means it. So, I’m letting him worry about it and I’ll worry about the kids.

Boys Being Boys

The boys have all been pretty terrible these last couple of days and that’s causing me a great deal of stress. I feel like I’m yelling a lot lately and they all just seem to be at really terrible stages. Kenzie is getting into talking back and I always find that really hard to deal with. I hate when my kids leave my mouth gaping and speechless. Carter seems to always want to fight with everyone and no one is ever interested in fighting. And so he’ll keep pushing and pushing and pushing until eventually the person gets irritated enough to strike back in a big way. Albeit, he hasn’t gotten hurt at all, there is a lot of crying involved in the whole process – this super dramatic, over-acted cry. And while Keirnan never seems to be directly involved in anything that is causing trouble, he does always have to involve himself in some way, sneakily. He’s also been lying, a lot!

I’m hoping that it will just ease itself out over the next couple of weeks. I think a great deal of it all is caused by excitement over back-to-school. I think a great deal of it is caused by a lack of structure in their days. I think once those two things become relatively more fixed, they’ll naturally let up on the constant bad behaviour. I hope…

The End…

I’ve been trying to write a lot over the last two days. My drafts folder is evidence of this, as I am officially up into the double digits for those. I keep getting two or three paragraphs into something, it’ll give me an idea for something else and the ideas just keep coming in those three paragraph snippets. Everything is left undone. And unfortunately, I struggle with picking things back up after I’ve neglected them. I’m working really hard on a few of the posts though and I’m hoping to have something erotic posted in the next day or so, because I gotta get at least one out of my drafts…

Well, that’s all I’ve got to catch up on for now. Just wanted to check in and vent 😉

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of August 21 – 28

#FridayFavorites - For Everyone

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

Favorite Google+ Update

Sometimes, it’s just there. On your mind. And you can’t simply ignore it. Sometimes, it’s not that simple. It won’t shut off…

Circle Me on Google+

Favorite Tweet

There’s been a lot of going through old blog posts lately and the walks down memory lane have been quite exciting and a little hilarious!

Follow Me on Twitter

Favorite Pinterest Board

Last week, I shared some of the beautiful buildings I’ve collected on Pinterest. This week, some of the spaces that I’d like to see within those buildings!

Follow Valerie’s board Spaces to Die For on Pinterest.

Follow Me on Pinterest

Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.


View on Tumblr

Follow My Tumblr

Favorite Facebook Update

Tons of polls lately in The Erotic Writers Group Community on Google+, and I found the stats to be really interesting!

Like Me on Facebook

Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog

Favorite YouTube Video

Not only are these two hilarious in almost every single show I’ve ever seen them in, they are also incredible at making hilarious songs. I appreciated this one a lot!

Subscribe to My Channel

Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

Seven Years of #Sexperiences

The Rantings - For Adults 18+

One of the many wonderful things about being a blog-a-holic is that I can take a walk down memory lane any time I want. I can go through the years of my life and read about them as an outsider to the experience. I can remember the details vividly because I described them vividly and I can relive the best and worst parts of my life. Obviously, I really like the bests!

I didn’t always write about my sex life. For a long time, I felt like I needed to keep it separate from all the other parts of my myself. But over a short period of time, I realized that so much of myself is my sex and my sex life. I quickly went from writing only about my life experiences, to also writing about my sex experiences – which I like to call my sexperiences.

The Boyfriend and I celebrated our seven year anniversary back in July. In that seven years, I have had four different blogs (that’s including this one) that have shared some of our most memorable sexperiences. Today, I wanted to take a walk down memory lane with you and share some of my favorites from the previous three.!

From The Rantings of a Tortured Mind – XXX Edition (2010)

The Boyfriend and I had been dating for quite awhile already when I officially got back to blogging after my breakup with Alfie. I started blogging about The Boyfriend and I’s sexperiences in 2010 when I began writing The Rantings of a Tortured Mind – XXX Edition. These were some of our most experimental years, when kink was something that we were actively exploring.

  • Orgasms and Floggers

    March 2010

    “It was obvious that he wasn’t as comfortable with the legs as he was with my ass, as he very gently hit my legs. He moved back to my ass and began doing a figure eight again, this time much harder and much faster. The harder and faster he went, the harder and faster I played with myself. Until finally, after probably close to half an hour of flogging, my muscles all contracted, my back arched and I experienced an incredible orgasm.”

     

  • From His Lips

    May 2010

    “I don’t want to start this post with “Last night…”, but I can’t seem to find any other way that seems appropriate for what I’m about to go into. So, last night… What was that movie from the 90’s with Kirsten Dunst? Crazy Beautiful, was it? That was what my experience was last night.”

  • YAY for Orgasms

    June 2010

    “Somehow, for the first time in a seriously long time, The Boyfriend and I managed to get away with having sex twice yesterday. Once in the early evening, when all the kids were down in their rooms and again late at night. And for the first time ever, I orgasmed three times!!!”

From Valerie Rayne Rants (2010 – 2013)

This blog was written during a very difficult time in The Boyfriend and I’s sex life. I was desperately wanting kink and he was drifting further and further away from kink. Many of the posts during these years are filled with frustration and questioning, complaining and confusion. But the sex was still mind-boggling, my favorite word to describe our sex during this time.

  • Sexy Dancing and Hopeful Conversations and The Last Post Continued

    July 2012

    “Imagine my absolute delight when he said all this. I told him that what he just described incorporates so much of what I want. Rewards for good (sexual) deeds, anal training and impact play. And all I have to do is have anal every once and awhile. Sounds like a good freaking deal to me!”

    “I needed to be able to focus on the sex and in that moment all I could think was, “Did he really just call me a dirty whore?!?!?”. I was in ecstasy, but still not cumming. I asked if I could roll over while he fucked me from behind and he responded, “Only if you’re going to be a good girl and cum on my cock” to which I promised that I would try.”

  • Woo! That Was Good 😉

    October 2012

    “I was too close to the edge of orgasm for that to be it for me, so I just kept playing until I eventually came. My muscles have never felt so on fire after a sex session of any kind. I felt like they were ripping in my abs and tearing in my arms. We fell asleep and I was pleased with the fact that I had had two orgasms and he had had none.”

  • We Were Primal

    December 2012″

    By this point, every one of our inhibitions had completely disappeared. We were primal. I half-moaned, half-growled at him, “I want you to break my pussy with your huge cock!”. This whole concept, his huge cock and breaking my pussy, really got to us both and you could tell by the change in our demeanor.”

  • Caressing and Words

    January 2013

    “I don’t know what it is about talking during sex that I find so insanely sexy. I am currently under the opinion that he could say anything to me during sex, even something entirely unrelated and un-sexy, and it would still make me go wild!”

From The Rantings of a Tortured Mind – Valerie Rayne Rants (2014 – 2015)

After years of coming from a place of frustration, I finally let go of what I wanted and felt like I needed. Although I’m still a total wannabe kinkster, I think about it less and bring it up less. Instead, it often happens when I least expect it and we seem to hone our sexual communication skills and it shows in this blog.

  • Your Safeword is Bananas

    December 2014

    “He turns so that he can see the clock and he’s watching the minutes tick by as he continues to thrust. I’m still trying to figure out exactly what he’s got planned, when he suddenly pulls back and roughly turns me over. His hand pushes down on my upper back and he says firmly, “Your safeword is bananas”, and I melted beneath him.”

  • I Fought and He Fought Back

    February 2015

    “He bounced my legs up until my thighs were resting on his arms and grabbed my arms and pinned them down to the bed as he thrust himself so deep into me that I immediately began fighting against him. But he just re-positioned his grip and slammed into me again. I kicked out my legs, I thrashed my arms, I pushed against him as hard as I could and while I succeeded in pushing him back, he was quickly back on top of me, holding down my arms and kissing me as hard as he could. I fought and he fought back.”

  • We Sexted!!!

    April 2015

    “I love how, even after seven years of being together, The Boyfriend can still leave my mouth gaping in shock. I love how, even after a thousand and one sexual encounters, we can still have ones that just absolutely blows my mind.”

  • Restrained and Released

    May 2015

    “Almost immediately, he was putting the restraints to use. He laid me on my back and roughly grabbed my left leg, yanking it up above my head and securing the velcro on the first strap. Then, he gently lifted my right leg and kissed my ankles as he strapped the next restraint onto me. I told him that he could tighten it by pulling “this” strap, I signaled with my chin. He smiled and pulled on the straps, my feet now touching the wall behind my head.”

There you have it, some of my favorite sexperiences that I’ve captured during The Boyfriend and I’s time together. As he said to me the morning of our anniversary, “Here’s to an amazing seven years. I can’t wait for the next seven!”, and neither can I. It’s been mind-boggling 😉

TO DO: Re-Launch The Erotic Writers Group

The List - For Adults 18+

As you probably read somewhere around here, I am the founder of The Erotic Writers Group. This has always been a Google+ community for #EroticWriters and #EroticReaders (our official hashtags) that allows them to connect, share, learn and inspire.

The Erotic Writers Group has gone through various stages, as all of my blogging adventures have. Originally, it was going to be a members-only group on a now defunct adult writers website. Then, Google+ came along and was the perfect platform for it and we’ve been there ever since. We’ve also ventured off and had our blog, Challenge Central and a ton of other offerings over the years.

However, a few months back, we stepped back and let the group just kind of run itself. Stopped all of our “stuff” and took a break from the hustle and bustle of it all. It’s a necessary mistake sometimes. That being said, the work has not stopped! Over the past few months, I’ve been hard at it to think of what I really want for the future of The Erotic Writers Group, what our members have said that they want and we’re starting to build a really nice foundation.

There’s still lots to be done though!

  1. Look for Help

    This one sounds so darn easy, doesn’t it? For some reason, it’s always the hardest part of it for me. Right now, I need help with everything, so narrowing it down isn’t easy.

  2. Finish the Website

    You’re hearing it here first (so, shhh!!!), but the website has been set up. I’ve worked really hard to get everything just perfect and now it’s time to start adding all the content.

  3. Run Some Tests

    Again, this is going to involve asking for help, so not easy. However, the site will need to be tested once all the content is added so that we can fix anything that isn’t working.

  4. Figure Out Exactly What We’re Offering

    I’ve got ideas… Lots and lots and too many ideas! I want to offer everything and anything that a writer or reader might need. Alas, that isn’t wise nor is it possible…

  5. Figure Out How We’re Monetizing

    The reality is: the group deserves to have a source of income – especially when she’s in full-blown active mode. There are so many options here and I just can’t decide on the right one for me/us.

  6. Get Back to Social

    Although I have been participating as a member of the group, I haven’t touched the official group social accounts in months. That includes Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, YouTube, etc.

  7. Get the Anthology Going Again

    It’s always been a goal of the group to release a group anthology. We have a lot of really talented writers and tons of interested readers, now all we need is the right people to bring the idea together.

  8. Tell the World About Us!

    I want to do a real website launch for The Erotic Writers Group. I want it to be a big deal for our members and I want it to expose us to new writers and readers. Again, tons of ideas lying in wait.

Of course, there are tons of other things that need to be done. I mean, I’ve only scratched the very surface of the to-do list and basically summed up a ton of things that really require a great deal of baby steps. It’s not going to be easy, but it will be worth it once it’s done.

#FridayFavorites: For the Week of August 7 – 14

#FridayFavorites - For Everyone

Ever wanted to be able to see what I’m up to all over the web without actually having to go all over the web? Well, now you can with #FridayFavorites. Join me every Friday to see my favorite finds and posts over the last week.

Favorite Google+ Update

Kaeidyn’s been busy practicing her gymnastics all summer with a friend of hers. She’s gotten quite good at a few of the moves. Caught this shot when we went to the Spray Park.

Circle Me on Google+

Favorite Pinterest Board

I’ve always wanted to wear high heels. I never do. I stumble about when I wear them and I feel like I tower over all of human nature – something that I don’t even need heels to feel like I’m doing. But, one day…

Follow Valerie’s board Shoes, Glorious Shoes on Pinterest.

Follow Me on Pinterest

Favorite Tumblr Find

Everything you find on my Tumblr will be absolutely NSFW and totally intended for adults only! But here’s my favorite PG-13 find from this week and be sure to check out my upcoming #TumblrFavorites post.


View on Tumblr

Follow My Tumblr

Favorite Facebook Update

It’s been far too long since I last played #TheRayneLegacy, thinking about starting over with a new legacy challenge on #TheSims4. Thoughts?

Like Me on Facebook

Favorite Tweet

This explains my lack of activity just about everywhere. Too sick to concentrate or do much of anything else, for that matter…

Follow Me on Twitter

Favorite Posts

In case you might’ve missed them over the last little while, here’s my favorite posts from around here over the last week…

Follow My Blog

Well, that’s my #FridayFavorites.

I encourage you to follow me wherever you are and if you have favorites that are different than mine, let me know what you loved in the comments below! And be sure to join me next Friday for another installment of #FridayFavorites – what will I find?

It’s Me Again!!

The Rantings - For Everyone

When I wrote the last post on my previous blog, I never expected that it would be my last post there.

Finally…

After years and years of avoiding it and after hours and hours of The Boyfriend talking me into it, I finally took the plunge and bought my first hosting and domain package. I’ve been planning it out for years and could never bring myself to do it and finally (and I say that with a great deal of relief), I just did it.

I have been sitting on this for a few months now, working diligently to make something that I can be proud of. I wouldn’t say it is at all perfect, and as with all blogs, it needs time to evolve and grow. But, I’ve got a workable base and something that I’m incredibly comfortable with and I cannot even begin to express the excitement I feel about this new journey.

I chose to hold off making my first post here until the older three kids came back from their Dad’s, that way I was sure to have stuff to write about. They got home yesterday and it has been a serious roller coaster of emotion around our house since. I think the last 48 hours has completely drained every resource I have available, however the fact the we’re only 3 shifts away from The Boyfriend’s summer vacation is making it all seem manageable.

Introductory Stuff…

Valerie Rayne's Family DynamicJust in case you don’t know, haven’t read my blogs before, or haven’t already deduced as much, I’ve made this handy little graphic to show off not only my family dynamic, but also to introduce you to the “characters” of The Rantings and how they all connect to me 😉

At the top, there’s me – Valerie Rayne. You can call me Val or Valerie, I like them both. I was previously in a relationship with Alfie, the father of “the older three” – which you’ll find me referring to them as, time and time again – a daughter, Kaeidyn and two sons, Kenzie and Keirnan. Currently, I am in a relationship with The Boyfriend, who is the father of my youngest son, Carter.

A lot of anything else you need to know about us, you’ll discover within the posts on The Rantings, The List and The Gallery, as well as my About page. If you ever have any questions regarding anything you read here, please don’t hesitate to ask in whichever form works best for you (as a comment, in a message, on Twitter, etc.). As those of you who have read anything I’ve written before can attest to, I’m an open book and can’t think of a single thing I have to hide from anyone!

Until We Meet Again…

Well, I’ll leave that there for my first post back and look forward to more posts over the coming days. If you’d like to follow or subscribe to The Rantings, you’ll find options for that in the sidebar. And feel free to browse The Archives to get a glimpse at my past blogging ventures from 2007 until now.